During the sermon on April 25th, we saw how
God intentionally established the annual Feast of Unleavened Bread so
that parents had a regular occasion to remind their children about the
amazing grace and power of God. Kids, just like adults, need to
be regularly reminded of their need for God. I challenged you
parents to make sure your kids participate in some sort of regular
worship experience; maybe that’s the Sunday morning service, maybe
that’s youth group at the youth center.
But how? How do you actually do
this? I know many of you want your kids to participate, but they
may not so much. Maybe you battle with your teenage over homework
and household chores; you don’t have the energy to fight about going to
church. Or maybe you are a young family thinking, “what should I
be doing now?” Below are some ideas and principles that will help
you with your children. A few may be age specific, but some are
necessary for all parents regardless of the age of your children.
Firstly, your kids must see genuine faith in
you; basically, you need to be setting the example. Our children
see us everyday. They know what we are really like. If your
faith isn’t genuine, they can tell. They know what your greatest
treasure is. If you’re a hypocrite, chances are that’s all your
kids are going to be when you force regular church attendance down
their throat.
Continuing this theme, what example are you
giving your children about church? Are you engaged in
worship? Are you participating in Sunday school? Is your
Bible open during the sermon? Do you complain about church
getting out late or serve up some “roast pastor” in the car on the way
home? Do you come to church grumbling? All these actions
are teaching your children how they should view church. Instead,
come eager and excited. Talk about the Lord’s Day as the best day
of the week. Serve others passionately. Implement habits
and activities for yourself and your family that teach your kids, “God
is really amazing!”
Finishing this theme of example, you might be
thinking, “But, Brian, I just don’t feel that strongly about my
relationship with God or church.” Then start pleading to God for
eyes to see his majesty and splendor. Ask God to create in you a
passion for him. Start feeding yourself the things of God praying
that God would develop your appetite for him. Want it for you and
ask God for a miracle in your own life.
Secondly, establish and then communicate
corporate worship as part of your family identity. When my boys
don’t want to come to church I’m planning on saying, “You are a Wipf
and this is what Wipfs do.” It’s who we are. Obviously,
this works best when you start young, but this works even with teenage
kids who aren’t excited about your newfound commitment to church
attendance. You are the parent; they are children (even
teenagers) and until they are “adults” and out of your house you are
responsible for their care (including spiritual care). NOTE: this
means it’s what you do, too. You can’t implement this principle
without the first one (being an example).
Next, especially with your teenagers, empower
your kids. Include your children in the decision making
process. Provide the parameters, and then let them make some
decisions within those parameters. Here’s an example: “Son, you
are going to participate regularly somewhere. You decide where
that’s going to be: Youth group or Sunday school.” Regularly
participating doesn’t mean participating in everything. So
establish the principle that needs to be followed, but then allow your
student to have a say in how that principle will be followed.
Finally, pray your guts out. The
ultimate goal isn’t regular participation at church; the goal is a
heart that treasures God above all things. Only a miracle of
sovereign grace will produce that. God has ordained that we
parents have a pivotal part to play in our children’s spiritual
development (so we ignore our influence to the detriment of our
children), but ultimately we need God to act with mighty power.
